Sick of being ill

When i was younger, a lot younger. I went through quite a bad patch health wise. I have my mothers blood in me, and she was a fighter. Im much the same and dont give into anything if I can help it. But i would come back from school and I would not be able to move, I was so tired. I would be in so much pain and discomfort that I would spend my weekends infront of the tv wrapped in a quilt. And i felt like such a FAKER. I mean if i tell you how I would feel, and the reasons behind it...id just feel like a looser. Of course it was theorised that due an illness i had in childhood, every now and again my system would collapse under itself
Now, years later, and I feel the same. Unfortunatly due to a colapsed tooth and exposed nerve im in pretty much constant agony. So to combat this I am on codeine and Im 90% sure im adicted to that....cos lets face it going through half a pack a day...not great
My eczema has flared up, and i know that whenever i tell people this they think i have a little rash on my knee. In actual fact it means i have open cuts all over my body and my skin likes to tighten to the point where i cant move without it splitting or tearing. The reason my skin flares up like this is because my imune system decides to fight itself. So that means i have no energy at all, my joints ache and burn, as do my lymph nodes, searing headaches (even through the fucking codeine) and to top it off im having more hot flushes than a GILF

So at the moment im a FUCKING NIGHTMARE to be around, I look shit, i feel shit im snappy as all hell and dreading it because i KNOW its going to get worse....all i want to do is hide in a duvet and not speak to anyone...is that too much to ask?

I write this in the hope that I dont keep needing to explain myself again and again